6.26.2004

Sexual Aesthetic

I’ve been pondering my fat admiration lately. On the off-chance an uninitiated has stumbled in here (by the way, welcome), this is basically referring to the fact that I’m attracted to fat women. The preferred term for this is usually “fat admirer” although some hallow objections are occasionally raised about how it should something like bbw admirer (Big Beautiful Woman: read Fat Woman) or Fat Woman Admirer. I think that’s redundant myself. All heterosexual men should be women admirers. If they aren’t, that’s a problem. It has nothing to do with FA’s in particular. Essential, Fat Admirer is just a simple and quite concise explanation of the point of difference. I admire fat. I find it aesthetically pleasing in all of its forms. Now, I want to be with a woman who intellectually stimulates in addition to physically stimulating me, but that’s beside the point. FA is just a little label meant to define one simple thing. Calling myself a fat creative funny intelligent progressive maybe with glasses probably with a small chest a bit short who is accepting of her body and rejects intentional weight loss woman admirer gets pretty damn unwieldy, don’t you think? And who could really use FCFIPMWGPWASCABSWIAOHBARIWLWA as an abbreviation, anyway?

So, like I was saying, I’ve been pondering my fat admiration lately. I’ve put up a personal ad at a general use site that’s notoriously fat unfriendly but has a wide readership. I’ve gotten some interesting response, which is nice for a change, but it occurs to me that I’ve never really considered how specific my physical type might be. Its not really been an issue for me in a long time. I sorta fell into my last two relationships and both women were relatively similar physically. I definitely liked it, so I wonder if that’s really my type now.

I used to always point out that I was attracted to women 200lbs and over to demonstrate how non-limiting being an FA was in comparison to being, well, a thin admirer. Some like to act as if being attracted to fat women is some kind of ultra-specific fetish. Why? Because I have a range of 400lbs that I find attractive where most guys are lucky if they have a range of 40lbs? Anyway, I guess I’m wondering if I might be a bit more specific than I realize.

I find smallish fat women aesthetically pleasing, don’t get me wrong, but I’m not sure there is a real sexual attraction there. I think it just sort of stops at the aesthetic point, though. Like, “that’s cute” but not progressing to “that’s hot.” But I’m not sure I really have a more specific point. I mean, I definitely know I’m a belly man, but I’d never really thought about a specific point where sexual attraction really begins. I guess I’m more, “I’ll know when I see it”. I’d guess around 300, but I can too easily think of exceptions below that point. And when it comes to physical attraction, I think being a belly man is more important to me than any specific weight. But both are easily trumped in importance by a woman who is accepting of herself. But, I don’t feel like I can just give up on the “total package” yet.

Which reminds me, I was supposed to write a post detailing what I’m looking for in a woman. Maybe that’s what I should have done instead of fussing over the difference between being aesthetically pleased with a fat woman, and being sexually attracted to a fat woman. But, for another day, now.

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