Why bother?

I wanted to write a post today about the hideous Lifetime movie "To Be Fat Like Me" and its message of pity and thin-superiority as a brave thin girl teaches us why thin people are the coolest and fat women are gluttons who we should pity instead of hate and how this is an enlightened message. But I just don't care anymore.

Nobody cares about Size Acceptance. People keep attacking fat people and if you speak out against them, you'll just get attacked for speaking out. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of caring about other people. Everyone tells me that everything should be purely subjectivist and whatever anyone wants is okay even though everyone wants to hate fat people so where does that leave me? I'm supposed to not care because I'm accepting of myself? Because I've found someone who is accepting? I'm supposed to stop caring about other people? I don't want to do that. I want to care. But everywhere I go I'm told I'm not supposed to care. I'm insulting for caring, or at least for saying so. I'm told I don't listen. I'm told I just don't understand. That if I just put everyone else first, I'd understand why I should just keep my mouth shut and not care.

I don't want to do that. But what's the point in trying if no one wants you to? If every time you open your mouth you're insulted for doing so. I'm sick of it. Maybe I should just care about myself. Retreat to my own life and stop caring when other people attack what I believe in. Just let it be everyone else's problem.

I'm just so sick of it. Everywhere I go I'm told I don't have a right to speak. I'm too fat. I'm not fat enough. I'm a man so I must not get it. I'm a feminist, so I must just be a fool. I'm just sick of it. I'm sick of caring.

Look, this is all rehtorical. Don't comment to this thread. My self-pity is hardly worth your time. This isn't a cry for help or a plea for validation. Its just frustration from being told over and over that I don't get a voice on Size Acceptance and that people who oppose it or who denigrate fat people have more of a right to speak up than I do. I just keep getting told to be quiet and I'm sick of wanting to speak out.

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